Diadem Day 3: Being powerful

I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure—which is: Try to please everybody.
— Herbert B. Swope

Welcome to Diadem Day 3, which, I think appropriately, is occurring at the high-energy point of the full moon. I hope Day 1 made you feel grounded, earthy, and in touch with your roots, and Day 2 left you feeling juicy—bursting with creative energy and floating on the high tide. Because today you’re going to play with fire.

Let me introduce this chakra by telling you what it governs: the ego; power; self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-respect; care of oneself and others; trust; risk-taking; sensitivity to criticism; responsibility for making decisions; personal honor; the digestive system and metabolism. Has anyone said “Yikes!” yet? If the key phrase for the 2nd chakra is “go with the flow,” the phrase for the 3rd chakra is “Just do it.”

In addition to The Women’s Comfort Book by Jennifer Louden, which I’ve used all week, some of these ideas come from Anodea Judith’s Chakra Balancing. I especially like her description of the ego: “The ego is like a house. It’s important to have a consistent home base, but you wouldn’t want to be confined there. You need to have a healthy ego identity to make your way through life’s challenges. You need to have enough self-worth to stick to your goals, defend yourself, and take risks.”

Physical exercises to stimulate the third chakra work your core. Abdominal crunches are classic. Yoga poses include plank pose, boat pose, and the warrior series. And I’m very fond of the moon salutation. Many of you may know sun salutations, but since this is the full moon night, try this moon series.

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For today (and the rest of your life):

1. Set a reasonable intention at the beginning of the day, and exercise your will to accomplish it. Make a list of daily goals and cross out each one as it is done. Budget your time, money, energy, and calories. Set your will toward completing a specific practice each day for a week or month, and stick to it! (The SadieLou plan?) All of these various exercises strengthen the will.


2. Your solar plexus (3rd chakra) is located in the center of your trunk, a few inches above your naval and just about at the level of the bottom of your ribs. What happens when you sit? Does it collapse into your belly? Make a point of sitting up straight, aligning your spine and opening your chest. You can breathe easier. Now notice how you stand. Does your 3rd chakra collapse then, too? Anytime you notice your energy slumping, practice good posture and see if it lifts your spirits, too.


3. (This point is directly from Jennifer Louden’s book) Eliminate guilt. Learning to be assertive is invaluable in helping you escape the trap of taking care of others’ needs before your own. You are the only caretaker of your self-esteem. This means, if you don’t assert yourself, if you don’t champion your rights, who is going to?
   
   Acknowledge aloud and often that you are not responsible for everyone’s feelings. This does not mean that you don’t care. To be empathetic is wonderful, but you need not feel guilty, ashamed, or responsible for another person’s feelings. But what if you still feel guilty?
   * Stop taking the blame for things that are not your fault. To accomplish this, before you say “I’m sorry” to someone, check to see if you had any control of what happened.
   * Ask yourself, “What am I getting out of feeling guilty?”
   * Acknowledge that you feel guilty, but don’t let it stop you.


4. Try out some affirmations. These are positive statements that you say to yourself until they actually become true. Here are some to try; you can say them to yourself in the mirror, sing them in the car, or write them down in your journal.
   * I deserve to nurture myself.
   * I now have the courage to live my life my way.
   * I am a wonderful person and deserve some time off.
   * Today I feel renewed and ready for any challenge.
   * My experiences have made me wise and strong.


5. Consciously set your boundaries. Define your limits to yourself. Write down what you will and won’t accept. Does someone in your family borrow things without asking? Does someone standing too close to you drive you crazy? Your limits exist naturally. You know that your boundaries are being invaded when you feel taken advantage of. (And remember where your 3rd chakra is: you feel this in your gut.) Begin to gently but clearly tell people in your life what your limits are. Visualize yourself saying “No.” Practice saying the word aloud (perhaps try it while looking in the mirror).
   
   In the next week, say no to four things you would normally agree to. At the same time, say yes to four things you would not normally allow yourself to have or do. Try to pay attention to how you feel about these changes.

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Being powerful is a lot of work! How about a prize? Today it is a skein of Cherry Tree Hill Supersock Thin (450 yards of superwash merino) in the colorway Raspberry Smoothie.

Have a great day, Ravenclaw!